I had an endiograph scheduled for 8 am. At least I think that's what it's called. I swallow barium and they x-ray me swallowing.
It was requested that I get there at 7:30 to do paperwork. The paperwork took no more than 10 minutes. That left me with 20 minutes to kill which I happily spent playing word games on my phone.
Up to this point I am reasonably content.
Promptly at 8, they took me change into a hospital top. My belongings, including my phone, were safely locked away. I am now sitting in a much smaller waiting room with no games but with magazines to flip through. Of course, the room was dimly lit and my reading glasses are locked away with my purse. I did manage to entertain myself with the photos in the magazine.
Not as content now.
The nurse came at about 8:15 and took me to the x-ray room. Cool, I think. Fifteen minutes after the hour isn't bad. I then proceeded to wait in a cold, even more dimly lit room for 20 minutes, with no phone games and no magazines. This room did have a clock, that I could watch ticking slowly by while no one came to perform my tests.
I am getting agitated and frustrated by this time. I had just decided to go find a magazine when the technician appeared.
Do the people who design these tests even think about the people taking them?
First they gave me some crystalline barium to drink with only a little water. That wasn't bad, kind of like drinking undissolved sugar in water.
But next I had to drink some really thick barium solution while they x-rayed me. It was like drinking flavorless pudding. Is there any reason flavor couldn't have been added? I nearly gagged.
Thirdly they gave me a large tablet of barium to swallow. Now, large pills getting stuck in my throat is the reason I am here. I asked, only partly joking, if they had paramedics on call.
Throughout this, the nurse is being somewhat sympathetic, while the x-ray technician is the opposite, condescending and impatient. He says the pill isn't that big and I shouldn't have a problem. (The last one I choked on was a Tylenol, for crying out loud.)
To me, it felt like the pill paused halfway down, but did complete the journey. The technician, "See it went down with no problem." Like I said, condescending.
Finally, they had me lay on my stomach and use a straw to drink a thinner version of the barium while I was x-rayed. The taste made me gag and the nurse thought I was choking. At least that ended the tests.
I got there at 7:30 and waited until 8:30 for a test that took 6 minutes. Apparently my time and comfort is of no consequence to them.
I've been to "test mills" that are punctual and considerate. This one was neither. I left feeling queasy from the barium and infuriated by the treatment.
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